Category: Articles

Damien Green is the Second-Most Powerful Politician in Britain. But Who is Damien Green?

Damien Green is the Second-Most Powerful Politician in Britain. But Who is Damien Green?

Damien Green is the second-most powerful politician in Britain. And yet, prior to deciding to write this article, if you had asked me “Who is Damien Green?”, I fear I might have replied “Isn’t he a goalkeeper?”. In my mind, Theresa May was stood on her own when she signed the DUP agreement. I remember …

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Corbyn and Nine Other Pop Culture Hitlers That Headlined At Glastonbury

Corbyn and Nine Other Pop Culture Hitlers That Headlined At Glastonbury

I could just see him. I pushed my head above the crowd at Glastonbury like a drowning rat desperately surfacing for air. He looked resplendent: his little moustache neatly trimmed, his armband secured tightly, and his Schutzstaffel hat tilted just slightly toward stage left. The crowd began to chant as he recited the final lines …

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Magic Money Tree Tells PM to ‘Fuck Off’

Magic Money Tree Tells PM to ‘Fuck Off’

Prime Minister and chairwoman of Witches Without Brooms Theresa May, 151, has announced that she wants to appoint the infamous Magic Money Tree to her ministerial cabinet. In-between meetings with the DUP and Robert Mugabe, Prime Minister May found the time to release a statement claiming that, by bringing Mr Mun-E-Tree into a ministerial position, …

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I am Donald Trump’s Evil Twin – Dark Trump! (PART 1)

I am Donald Trump’s Evil Twin – Dark Trump! (PART 1)

Behold, mortals! Cower in fear at the presence of I, Dark Trump! You may well have heard of my twin brother, President Donald Trump. He’s been causing quite the stir of late in your petty ‘news outlets’ and ‘political spheres’. Truly, it cannot be denied that the Donald is a controversial and divisive figure, but …

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Verbal Discharge’s Obscure Christmas Facts, Part Two

Verbal Discharge’s Obscure Christmas Facts, Part Two

If you haven’t seen part one, check it out! God forbid you miss any of these earth-shattering facts. The air grows lighter, the mood grows lighter, your money receptacle grows lighter. Oh… and the house grows lighter, because, you know, you’ve probably put up Christmas lights by now. And, like slavering yetis, the majority of …

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22 Cardigans Mark Wahlberg has never worn

22 Cardigans Mark Wahlberg has never worn

Responsible for some films that some people have seen, Mark Wahlberg is a man many other men look up to.  Though his acting is indisputably describable as human, two-time Oscar nominee Mark is best known as a wearer of cardigans. In fact, he once wore a cardigan so well he quite literally stopped time, though …

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11 Times So-And-So Was Our Favourite Character in Scrubs

11 Times So-And-So Was Our Favourite Character in Scrubs

Undeniably the greatest sitcom starring Zac Braff to run for 182 episodes between October 2, 2001 and March 17, 2010, Scrubs holds a firm place in so many of our hearts. In fact, the only things that are more feverishly entrenched in the four chambers of our favourite hollow muscular organ than our favourite show …

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Verbal Discharge’s Obscure Christmas Facts, The Beginning

Verbal Discharge’s Obscure Christmas Facts, The Beginning

Christmas has been everywhere, on the television, on the radio, and on the high-street. But it wasn’t until the John Lewis advert that the true capitalist inside of us all rolled over like an overweight boxer dog, bounced on the big ole Christmas trampoline of pre-Noël excitement, and cried out in pure festive joy. Even the Verbal Discharge lot …

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Eight Times Someone Definitely Said Something, Someplace, Sometime

Eight Times Someone Definitely Said Something, Someplace, Sometime

I’ve spent four years, two degrees, and over £50,000 broadening my horizons at University. What I learnt was this, somebody, somewhere, said something and that is somewhat important for some reason So here is the definitive list of some things people have said, with some citations, in some sort of a list.   1.    Erm… …

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