EPISODE #13: George Clooney’s Pocketful of Hate Crime

Who’s that girl? Who’s that girl? When you see her, say a prayer and kiss your heart goodbye. She’s trouble, in a word getting closer to the fire. She’s also a podcast, not a girl. You should put your glasses on, mate. Take a closer look. What made you think that was a girl? It’s quite obviously an audio file.

On this week’s Verbal Discharge, Robbie covers Pocketful of Sunshine, James writes to George Clooney and Jordan makes the original observation that HP Lovecraft was really rather racist.

You can download the show by clicking here, or listen in the player above, or visit iTunes/a podcast app and download the blighter.

SPOILERS!

And the materials we discuss in the show, available here:

Zoe Quinn’s Hitler-or-Lovecraft quiz

The completed letter to George Clooney:

Dear Mr. Clooney,

First off, you were proper sick as The Batman, and so were your nipples. I have heard about your evergreen sickening fascination with dolls. Please find attached two metaphysical human-based miniature toy men.

Anyway, we heard you were into charity. I did some charity once, drawing some inspiration from your really really proper sick like i mean it really role as The Batman and beat a non-violent shoplifter half to death. The other half of his life was left to wallow in the shame of his defeat, like a Jamaican man with disappointingly small toes.I think you have a pretty great jawline and are really, really handsome. Amal is a lucky girl if you know what I mean. I want you to know though that we are all also really handsome so you won’t feel uncomfortable hanging around us.

By the way George, Can I call you George? I’m gonna call you George, can we borrow your face? Just the neck upwards, a week Thursday would be grand. We’ll take good care of it, and return it to you with a full tank of petrol.

We are the best show on hit station Phantom Radio and a very well regarded podcast. We are commonly referred to by our mothers as almost as good as This American Life. We would love to have you on a guest, and will pay you in metaphysical caricatures of the human form, an effigy made mostly of the limbs of orphans/Teresa May, sandwiches because we heard you were into sandwiches and will sacrifice livestock in your honour every week between now and your first appearance on the show. So no pressure.

I saw in Up in the Air (Which is a pretty fly flick by the way) that you love being on the airoplanes almost as much as you love being on the air, so why not combine both your passions (Sorry Amal) and come to Derby, England, the United Kingdom, Europe and be on our really really good radio show! Although it’s more of a podcast at the moment. We should probably state that now.

Say hi to the wife, don’t get in another motorcycle accident and enjoy ham,

Love and regards,

Verbal Discharge

Discharge.

One of the contributors to the world's third-to-best podcast not about squid, writing in third person and pretending to be the collective.